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7 Greatest Gifts My Dad Ever Gave Me
by Marnie Pehrson
Due to the level of family break-ups and divorce, more and more people today
are being raised without the consistent influence of a good father. Many
children are fortunate if they get to see their father every-other weekend.
As I meet people who have grown up under these circumstances, my gratitude
continues to grow for the fact that I had the blessed experience of being
raised with my biological father not only in my home, but also as an active
influence in my life.
My fondest memories of childhood are those hours I spent sitting on the
couch with my father as he taught me how to read and how to do math problems
or just asked my opinion on things. Although my father has his flaws, just
like any mortal man would, I don't think I could have had a better father.
I'd like to discuss 7 gifts my father gave that money cannot buy and nothing
can replace - 7 gifts that made me who I am today - 7 gifts which I believe
would cure a multitude of ills in our society.
His Time
My father spent hours with me teaching me, talking with me, and listening to
me. It seemed as if we were inseparable. As a child I felt he belonged just
to me because I got all the attention I needed.
Affection
All those nights he spent tickling my belly, playing his harmonica or
singing to me until I fell asleep are indelibly imprinted in my mind. As a
child I felt incredibly loved, incredibly cared for. This foundation of
affection built security, stability and trust in the most formative years of
my life. Even at age 16, I remember my dad coming in my room when I had my
friends over and he'd chat with us for a few minutes. As he'd leave I'd give
him a kiss on his cheek. I remember one friend saying, ''You have such a
great dad!'' Even then, I knew I did.
A Love of Learning
As I mentioned earlier, my dad spent many hours teaching me how to read and
do math. As young as the age of 3, he had me reading the newspaper. He used
to say he could give me anything to learn and I'd learn it - no questions
asked. He said if he'd handed me a telephone book and said, ''Memorize
this'' I would have done it. I believe this is largely due to the love,
confidence and trust I had in my father. Whatever he thought was worth
learning, I knew must be worthwhile and even fun.
Confidence
My dad actually raised me to be a bit of a show off and a ham-bone. He was
so thrilled that I could read and do math tricks that he had me show them to
everyone who came to the house. And of course, a young child is going to be
on cloud nine when everyone starts ooh-ing and awe-ing over how smart she
is. What confidence that built! To this day, I still have this compelling
urge to take what I've learned and share it with others. And I largely
attribute that level of confidence - the confidence to even think anything
I'd have to say would be worthwhile to someone else - to my father's
influence. So now you know who to blame for my verbosity.
Independence
My father had this habit of asking questions of us children. He'd ask me,
''Marnie, would you rather be the smartest girl in school or the prettiest
girl in school?'' Whatever I said was ok, but whenever I gave the better
answer, he'd say, ''You know, I think you're right. I think you're onto
something there.'' Our opinions were always valued and never belittled -
even if they weren't exactly what he wanted to hear. But he always subtly
reinforced the opinions we had that were sound and worthwhile. My father
truly believes that children are smarter than most adults are. He honestly
valued our opinions. This kind of unconditional respect enabled me to think
for myself. I had literally no desire to conform to the crowd as a child or
teenager. I virtually did not even know the meaning of the term ''peer
pressure.'' This gift of independent thinking allowed me to stand up for
what was right even when it may have been unpopular.
Trust
My dad trusted us implicitly. If we were out at night, he only asked that we
call in if we were going to be late so that he wouldn't worry that we had
been in a car wreck. He trusted us to do the right thing, and because we
knew he trusted us, we would never want to let him down.
Love of Country and Freedom
My father is a true patriot, a friend to freedom. He taught us to love and
understand the Constitution of the United States and instilled in us the
ability to determine which laws or candidates were constitutionally sound
and those that were not. He sees freedom as our most treasured gift from
God, and taught us that freedom is protected and fostered when we make right
choices and give other people that same freedom. We cannot build our own
freedom by taking away the freedom of another individual.
I am convinced if every child had a father who gave her these 7 gifts, many
problems would be solved in our society. I myself have fallen woefully short
in passing these gifts on to my own children. Yet the older I get and the
more I learn about the problems faced by individuals in our society, the
more I can trace my happiness and success in life back to these seven
priceless gifts. I just hope it is not too late for me to start passing them
on to my own children.
About the Author
Marnie Pehrson is a wife and mother of soon-to-be 6 children, an Internet
consultant, writer & creator of SheLovesGod.com, IdeaMarketers.com,
Ads4Homes.com, and Pros-n-Cons.com. Her projects may be reached from
www.pwgroup.com
SeptemberLady "Born and have lived in Southern MD most of my life. My husband and I just finished building a new home on the family farm, where I hope to retire in the near future.
My interests: Doll collecting, cookbook collector (especially old ones), antiques, family/friend get-togethers, cooking/baking, flower and vegetable gardening, bird-watching."
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